Surprises & Sweet Sadness


As summer comes to a close, I find myself weighing in on the pros and cons of this season. Being a Texan, the major con would be the near heat strokes you experience daily, the sunburns that don't actually turn into tans for the fairer skin folk like myself, and though I have more free time to spend with my friends, vacation schedules always seem to clash and I find myself missing those that I got so accustomed to seeing on a daily if not hourly basis. These setbacks are balanced out with stress-free living (mostly anyway), ample time to do this thing called sleep (a foreign concept to me for the better part of high school), and the freedom to do things that are rarely made time for during the chaos of a school year: travel, read, and think. Really think. I will say, though, there can be too much of a good thing. Sometimes I find myself (as I think a lot of girls do) thinking too much. Overanalyzing a bit. A healthy dose of mind churning never did anybody any harm though, and I find that my reflective moments can be triggered in the strangest of places. Take, for instance, this quote from Dawson's Creek. When Joey meets Jen's dad, he tells her that he loves New York because it surprises him every day even though he has lived there his whole life. When asked why, he replies:

A city like New York, where everything is moving all the time at this constant driving pace, it's like a living organism, breathing and changing and over time your relationship to it becomes like this incredible romance. At first, it's intoxicating, irresistible, and then slowly it becomes comfortable and safe. You have this cellular connection to it, as if you've known each other forever, like your oldest happiness. And sometimes you're on the outs and sometimes you're making up. And every now and then you catch yourself in this transcendent moment where you think to yourself 'oh my gosh I'm madly in love with you…and I always will be.' And that's when it surprises me.

And in recent episodes, the characters have moved into their college years, giving me a fictional preview of what the future may hold. Joey's professor tells her about what he considers the best ending in literature, which I found to be a very intriguing idea.

Joey: So what is the best ending in all of literature? Don't say Ulysses. Everyone says Ulysses.

Prof: That's easy. Sentimental Education by Flaubert.

Joey: And what happens?

Prof: Nothing really. Just two old friends sitting around remembering the best thing that never happened to them.

Joey: How do you remember something that never happened?

Prof: Fondly. You see Flaubert believed that anticipation was the purest form of pleasure…and the most reliable. And that while the things that actually happen to you will invariably disappoint, the things that never happen to you will never dim, never fade. They will always be engraved in your heart with a sort of sweet sadness.

So my mind numbing summer television show addiction has actually sparked some relatively intellectual thought that is slowly but surely helping my mind segue from the summer vacation its been on. Two weeks from tonight will be move-in eve, and I think it's safe to say the excitement is really kicking in.


mary said...

This actually made me think...
Interesting post!